Search

Bethany Hang Out

Catholic contemplative life and devotion

Tag

Faith

Transform Your News Consumption Into Prayer

If I don’t watch out I can become a bit of a news junky; especially these days when scary, cruel and chaotic things happen daily. I feel like I have to keep up with all the news and analysis. This is so I can be a better activist and verbal defender of all that is good, and better able to speak up when there is injustice. I also say I keep up with world and national events because I want to hear about things I should pray about. I do pray about these things. However it occurs to me sometimes when I have read the same story or heard the basically the same discussion about the same story over and over in a week’s time, or even in one day, that my time could certainly be better spent praying. 

I am thinking about this a lot today especially because it is the feast day of the beautiful Carmelite Saint, Teresa Benedicta of the Cross (Eidth Stein). My Secular Discalced Carmelite Community is named for her. 

I have a strong belief that prayer takes us in Spirit along with Jesus and Mary to comfort those who suffer. St. Teresa Benedicta wrote about this beautifully. 

The world is in flames: do you wish to put them out? Contemplate the Cross: from the open Heart the blood of the Redeemer pours, blood which can put out even the flames of hell. Through the faithful observance of the vows, you make your heart free and open; and then the floods of that divine love will be able to flow into it, making it overflow and bear fruit to the furthest reaches of the earth.

Through the power of the Cross you can be present wherever there is pain, carried there by your compassionate love, by that very love which you draw from the Divine Heart. That love enables you to spread everywhere the Most Precious Blood in order to ease pain, save, and redeem. 

She would have known, from her formation in the Teresian Carmel, that prayer is a true work of the Church. Her spiritual Mother, St. Teresa of Avila taught this and Teresa Benedicta saw how relevant it was for the times she lived in, there in Nazi Germany when she was a woman of a Jewish family and at the end of her life, a Discalced Carmelite nun. She was taken, along with her sister, Rosa, to be put to death in a concentration camp. She was writing in urgent times. She offered her life for her Jewish people. 

Some Carmelite nuns used to have a blog called, “Praying the News.’ Each week a different Sister took a news story that stood out to her and write a reflection and prayer, seemingly following the basic pattern of St. Teresa of Avila’s Prayer of Recollection. These particular nuns retired years ago and their blog is now defunct. 

However, maybe I should take up their idea. I think I will do something like this. Some Chrsitian publications are doing a prayerful “nonpartisan” reflection and a little prayer about the news. It may not surprise you that I think the time for not taking a side is long over. As St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross put it, “The world is in flames.” 

The world is in flames. The struggle between Christ and Antichrist rages openly, and so if you decide for Christ you can even be asked to sacrifice your life.

To me this is self-evident if you aren’t entangled in Trump-ism. The man is an anti-Christ personality and has even led many good people astray though I will never understand how that could have happened. 

There are some things I can do about it such as stand up for vulnerable people in the ways I can, and offer them my love, presence and support. 

Otherwise I can pray. This kind of prayer is not of the “Oh thoughts and prayers” variety. It’s the kind that trusts God to act, not even knowing what God will do but knowing he hears and that he will. 

So I’m going to start thinking about how I can pray the news, more than use up so much time reading and listening to it. (Once is enough, right?) 

I’ll see what I can work on. I will try posting a “Praying the news” here each week. How about Sundays? 

See you then. 🙂 

Pools of silence that heal the world


Things are so crazy right now. The world is crazy and our lives are crazy. We all know this. My life has had a lot of what people call “drama.” Right now is no exception. As I worked on my book about St. Teresa’s Prayer of Recollection (Meeting the One who loves you; St. Teresa of Avila’s way of prayer. Scheduled to be released on her feast day, October 15,) I thought about the development of my discipline of prayer in the middle of stress and difficulties.

My discipline of daily prayer was, of course, very imperfect. I had trouble being consistent. I was, as I mention sometimes, widowed young then raising two kids alone for many years. I could hardly get a moment to eat or do the dishes when the youngest was a baby. How did I develop a contemplative life?

I was reading over again a few pages from the book Poustinia by Servant of God Catherine Dougherty last night and came across this wonderful quote from her:

Deserts, silence, solitude, are not necessarily places but states of mind and heart. These deserts can be found in the midst of the city, and in the every day of our lives. We need only to look for them and realize our tremendous need for them. They will be small solitudes, little deserts, tiny pools of silence, but the experience they will bring, if we are disposed to enter them, may be as exultant and as holy as the one God himself entered. For it is God who makes solitude, deserts, and silences holy.

Poustinia

This is what I did. I found little deserts, tiny pools and pockets of silence in the midst of my harried days, in the midst of daily tasks like folding laundry, doing dishes. I have clear memories that are precious to me of the tenderness and wisdom of God, passing by as if brushing near my cheek, touching my heart at times I was doing little things like sweeping the living room floor. There were brief but fruitful moments of silence after taking the trash out when I looked up at the night sky and smiled at God, or in the middle of cooking, working or doing dishes.

Catherine writes that when we carry out the duties of our state in life, and when we are disposed in heart to receive these moments of quietness, they will come. We will notice them like a gentle hand on our shoulder saying, “Wait just a minute.”

I was so overwhelmed as a single mom. I had a great dream, during that time though, that I went into the kitchen and Jesus was there, hair in a ponytail, wiping out my refrigerator for me. I was so grateful in the dream, and happy about it when I woke up. Maybe he meant that if I took care of my prayer when I could, he would make sure things got done, and he would be there for me when I turned to him.

I still find little deserts in my still busy life today. I have built on these moments over the years, to include quiet moments of connection with the young special needs people I work with, a quiet moment petting my dog, Joey, or listening closely to someone needing to be heard. As Catherine and all the mystics point out, the fruits of conscious contact with God spill out to contact with others. Love always moves and flows. By it’s nature it can’t keep to itself. If our prayer is authentic, it won’t even stay in it’s scheduled time and place. God will start splashing it all over our lives and the lives of others too. It has to grow, it has to flow, it has to blossom to be real.

Prayer and love of others, of service, support one another, each setting off and intensifying the colors of the other. They don’t exist without one another.

St. Teresa, S.O.G. Catherine Dougherty and St. Edith Stein (Teresa Benedicta of the Cross) wrote extensively of how contemplative prayer actually has an effect on the growth and conversion of others. It goes out even further to change the world. We all need to take this very seriously right now. Not only do we need to be supported in these scary times by God, we also need to be his light, and as St. Teresa of Avila says, his hands and feet, his clear voice in this world that needs his compassion and love. We have forgotten these things and closed our hearts. We need conversion of heart as a people.

God has made us all connected to one another. So your moment of “found desert” while your’e waiting in line, stuck in traffic, putting gas in the car, taking a deep breath and reaching out to God, can open a window in Heaven, letting the wind of the Spirit rush in. God can work in an instant, even change everything, making our little second of love BIG.

So let’s pay attention today to our possibilities, our tiny pools of silence, pockets of inner solitude, the quietness of heart that come with God’s touch on our faces, the peace that comes from him in those moments. They are more than we could ever imagine. They will shine on us, on others, on the whole world.

“ … a silent heart is a loving heart, and a loving heart is a hospice to the world.”

Servant of God, Catherine Dougherty

Novena to Our Lady of Mt. Carmel

Prayer to be prayed every day of the novena

The Flos Carmeli

O beautiful flower of Carmel, most fruitful vine, holy and singular, who did bring forth the Son of God, ever still remaining a pure Virgin, assist us in our necessity.

Oh Star of the Sea, help and protect us.

Show us that thou art our Mother.

Our Lady of Mt. Carmel,

pray for us.

Amen

Day 1

*Pray the Flos Carmeli

I will allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak to her heart.

Hosea 2:14

Mary, Queen of Carmel, take us to the places where God spoke to your heart. Teach our hearts to soften, to open as yours did, that we might hear what the Lord has to say in that tender voice of his. Clear our minds of their scurrying, and help us to be still. Lead us, gentle star, into the deepest depths of quiet and peace by your side. Draw us into the Heart of Jesus.

  • Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. Walk with her in silence the craggy path to the peaks of Mt. Carmel overlooking the sea. A gentle breeze flutters her veil. Watching, you realize the breeze is a voice speaking to you, that it is the Holy Spirit. What does the Spirit say to you as it ruffles your hair and kisses your face?

Our Lady of Mt. Carmel, pray for us.

Day 2

*Pray the Flos Carmeli

The desert and the parched land will be glad;
    the wilderness will rejoice and blossom.
Like the crocus,  it will burst into bloom;
    it will rejoice greatly and shout for joy.
The glory of Lebanon will be given to it,
    the splendor of Carmel and Sharon;
they will see the glory of the Lord,
    the splendor of our God.

Isaiah 35:1

In you, Mary, the Word was treasured as you meditated in your heart, and in you the Gospel blossomed abundantly. Your soul and your body were miraculously fruitful. In your humble simplicity the Spirit crowned you with splendor and glory beyond our understanding. But when I see you, Mary, you are quiet and smiling- your ornaments all within. Teach us to adorn ourselves with humility and simplicity. Draw us after you by the scent of your flowers of the heart, warmed by the sun that is the Lord’s joy shining on us.

  • Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. She is walking in a field of wildflowers. Catch up to her. She is picking flowers and filling the hem of her mantle with them. She motions to you and you offer her the bottom of your shirt for the overflow. She smiles and begins to fill the pocket you made for all these flowers. You have to sit down so she can fill your lap too. Lift some to your face and breathe in their scent.

Mary, beauty and glory of Carmel, pray for us

Day 3

*Pray the Flos Carmeli

Who are my mother and my brothers?” he asked.

Then he looked at those seated in a circle around him and said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.

Mark 3:33-35

Mary, you leapt to do the will of God at every sign of it with the love and trust of a little child, with the courage of a warrior bold. You were not only the physical Mother of the Lord, you were his spiritual mother and sister as well. You not only pondered the word of God given to you, but acted on it. Always you “arose and went with haste” wherever the Spirit called you. Teach us to listen, ponder, pray and to act on God’s word to us as you did unfailingly.

*Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. She puts a plate of food in front of you; bread, lentils and dates perhaps. She sits down to eat with you. As you bless the food together, you think, “Let us eat the bread of the will of God.” She smiles at you. You know you will have everything you need to do just that. And this is really good food, too.

Mary, Mother of the Word, pray for us.

Day 4

*The Flos Carmeli

God lives. I am standing in his presence. – The Prophet Elijah . (See 1Kings 17:1)

Mother of Carmel, you tended the fire of continual awareness of God’s presence in your heart daily as you swept the floor, made dinner, worked in the fields, held your Child, shopped in the market, loved and served the people around you. Open our hearts to perceive God within us, and in our daily lives; among the pots and pans, in the work we do daily, in the stolen moment of quiet, in the breaths before sleep. Help us come into the glow of constant contact with God you lived in within you and around you. Teach us the Practice of the Presence of God (Brother Lawrence)

*Spend a quiet moment with Mary now, tending the hearth, keeping the fire burning brightly, talking with her about this and that. Feel the fire’s warm glow on your face. She leans her head on your shoulder.

Mother in whose heart we live, where we find our Beloved, pray for us.

(St. Maryam of Jesus Crucified said, “I live in the Heart of my Mother. There I find my Beloved.”)

Day 5

*The Flos Carmeli

 The Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth be silent before him.

Habakkuk 2:20

Mary you were the temple of the Lord in a unique way. How beautifully you show us the truth that we who love Jesus are his temples too. Help us to make time to be alone and silent before God in the temple of our hearts with the One who we know loves us. (Teresa of Avila) As you did, let us cherish the Lord within us, love him, know him, listen to him, silently speak to him, look at him and let him look at us.

  • Take Mary’s hand now and allow her to lead you gently to your inner Temple where Jesus waits. Be there for a moment.

Mother of Divine Love, pray for us.

Day 6

*Pray the Flos Carmeli

I have set myself in silence and peace,

as a little child has rest in in it’s mother’s arms,

even so my soul.

Psalm 131: 2

Oh Mary, the lowly handmaid, the simple girl who loved God in your littleness, teach us to be little too. Help us to be humble in your easy, joyful way. Help us to be free to run lightly in God’s paths, to laugh easily, to dance without thinking, to be happy in his world that is so beautiful, and vast. The world around us is sign of his creative love, a glimpse of the Kingdom to come we are helping to make present by being little and humble in the arms of Jesus.

  • Spend a quiet moment playing with the little Mary a game you loved as a child. Let her throw her arms around you then. Hug her back.

Child Mary, little, humble and free, pray for us.

Day 7

*The Flos Carmeli

As Elisha watched, [Elijah being taken up to Heaven] he cried out, “My father, my father, the chariots and horsemen of Israel!” And he saw Elijah no more. So taking hold of his own clothes, he tore them in two.  Elisha also took up the mantle that had fallen from Elijah. Then he took the mantle of Elijah that had fallen from him and struck the waters. “Where now is the LORD, the God of Elijah?” he asked. And when he had struck the waters, they parted to the right and to the left, and Elisha crossed over.…

2 Kings 2: 12-14

Holy Mother and Queen of Carmel, your Scapular is your prophetic mantle over our shoulders, a sign of our consecration to you, our silent devotion to you all though the day and during the night when we sleep figuratively wrapped in it’s protection.. The Brown Scapular is your hand on on our shoulder as we travel the Royal Road of prayer, and in the good works you lead us to. Help us to go forward with courage, to stand confidently as your children; seeing as you see, loving as you love, and serving from the heart. Help us to live as worthy sons and daughters of so wonderful a Mother.

*Spend a moment with Our Lady now. Lay your scapular in her lap and let her kiss it and put in on you again over your head and shoulders.

Mary, spiritual daughter of Elijah the Prophet, pray for us who wear your Scapular.

Day 7

*The Flos Carmeli

 Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

Galations 6:2

Mary, in Carmel you are not only Mother and Queen, you are our sister and friend. Friends bear one another’s burdens. We know that you have always helped us bear our burdens and that you hear our sorrows. We want you to know we are here for you too. Share with us the sorrows of your loving heart, your concerns for your children. We know you always lead people to your Son, that you love us all, that human cruelty breaks your heart terribly. Help us to care about all that you care about, to listen to you, and to do something to help you in your mission to humanity, to be your kindly hands in this world where there is so much hate and indifference. Help us to find joy in all that you take joy in, the good things people do, the beauty to be seen, the love that is there in everything.

*Spend a quiet moment with Mary. Sit with her at her kitchen table maybe with tea or coffee. Ask her what she wants to tell you about. What does she say? Maybe today you can act on one of her concerns.

Mary, our friend and Sister, pray for us.

Day 8

  • Pray the Flos Carmeli

Leave here, turn eastward and hide in the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan.  You will drink from the brook, and I have directed the ravens to supply you with food there.”

So he did what the Lord had told him. He went to the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan, and stayed there.  The ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning and bread and meat in the evening, and he drank from the brook.

1 Kings 17:3-6

Mary, as Elijah did, you allowed the Lord to protect and take care of you, to take care of everything. You hid in the heart of God, drinking deeply from the stream of Divine Love. With you let us learn to hear the still, small voice of God, to let him care for us when we are afraid of the consequences of doing as he asks us. Remind us that when we hear him and respond, he will give us all that we need every time, just as he did for Elijah and for you.

*Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. Watch her as she fills a clay jar with water from the stream. It’s a sunny balmy morning. Birds are singing. You can hear the brook flowing. She brings you the water to drink. Drink deeply.

Mary, help of Christians, and Mother of Mystics, pray for us.

Day 9

Like a cedar in Lebanon I grew tall,

like a cypress on Mount Hermon;

I grew tall like a palm tree in Engedi,

like rosebushes in Jericho;

Like a fair olive tree in the field,

like a plane tree beside water I grew tall.

Like cinnamon and fragrant cane,

like precious myrrh I gave forth perfume;

Like galbanum and onycha and mastic,

like the odor of incense in the holy place.

I spread out my branches like a terebinth,

my branches so glorious and so graceful.

I bud forth delights like a vine;

my blossoms are glorious and rich fruit.

Come to me, all who desire me,

and be filled with my fruits.

You will remember me as sweeter than honey,

better to have than the honeycomb.

Those who eat of me will hunger still,

those who drink of me will thirst for more.

Whoever obeys me will not be put to shame,

and those who serve me will never go astray.

Sirach 24:13-22

Mary, Mother and Queen of Carmel, you are all of this and more to us, our beauty, our joy, our wisdom, our love for you an incense offered to the Lord who loves you even more than we can. Today we consecrate ourselves to you, Our Lady of Mt. Carmel. We dedicate our lives to God’s beauty and glory, and to yours. We belong to you, to your Son, to light and life and love. We want to spend our lives in the sweet companionship of your Spirit.

*Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. She is luminous in loveliness, as if she were made of light. You kneel before her. Closing your eyes, to pray, then opening them to see her again, you realize you are next to her in the kitchen. She is chopping vegetables. Join her. Stay with her all day.

Mary, Mother and Queen of Carmel, our Sister the Throne of Wisdom, pray for us.

A Litany for Mary’s Immaculate Heart

Lord, have mercy on us. 
Christ, have mercy on us.
Lord, have mercy on us. Christ, hear us.
Christ, graciously hear us.
God the Father of Heaven,
Have mercy on us.
God the Son, Redeemer of the world,
Have mercy on us.
God the Holy Spirit,
Have mercy on us.
Holy Trinity, one God,
Have mercy on us.

Heart of Mary, pray for us.
Heart of Mary, according to the heart of God, pray for us.
Heart of Mary, united to the Heart of Jesus, pray for us.

Heart of Mary sister of our hearts pray for us

Heart of Mary in whom the Gospel blossomed in contemplation pray for us

Heart of Mary always merciful pray for us

Heart of Mary stout and of great courage pray for us

Heart of Mary free and open for God pray for us

Heart of Mary always ready to be the first to love, to serve, to be present, pray for us

Heart of Mary in which there is room for everyone pray for us

Heart of Mary, her gracious core of love, understanding, and acceptance pray for us

Heart of Mary, freely humble and giving pray for us

Heart of Mary, never failing to love anyone pray for us

Heart of Mary seeing each one’s beauty and Godly purpose pray for us

Heart of Mary, loving and understanding each of us completely, pray for us

Heart of Mary, always seeing God, living in his presence pray for us

Heart of Mary, attentive to the Word pray for us

Heart of Mary, holding Jesus our Treasure pray for us

Heart of Mary, gifting us the Pearl of Great Price pray for us

Heart of Mary, our friend, pray for us

Heart of Mary, hearing the cries of the world, pray for us

Heart of Mary, scarred by suffering love, pray for us

Heart of Mary, strong in faith even when she did not understand what was happening, pray for us

Heart of Mary, with us in our work, one with us in all things but sin, pray for us

Heart of Mary trusting and bold like the heart of a child , pray for us

Heart of Mary drawing us to Jesus, pray for us

Heart of Mary, deepening our prayer, pray for us

Heart of Mary, accompanying us always pray for us

Heart of Mary, in solidarity with the lowly, pray for us

Heart of Mary praying that the lowly will be lifted up, the mighty de-throned, the hungry filled, the rich emptied, the proud scattered in their inmost thoughts, pray for us

Heart of Mary to be found among the least of our brothers and sisters, pray for us

Heart of Mary full of joy and always sharing it with us, pray for us

Heart of Mary, ready to laugh, of easy smiles and good humor, pray for us

Heart of Mary, drawing us after you in the fragrance of your holiness, pray for us

Heart of Mary filled with the Holy Spirit and wisdom pray for us

Heart of Mary bursting with the praises of God, pray for us

Heart of Mary, drawing the Spirit to rest on God’s people, pray for us

Heart of Mary always speaking Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, pray for us

Immaculate Heart of Mary, meek and humble of Heart,
Make our hearts according to the Heart of Jesus.

Let us pray:

O most merciful God, who for the salvation of sinners and the refuge of the wretched, has made the Immaculate Heart of Mary most like in tenderness and pity to the Heart of Jesus, grant that we, who now commemorate her most sweet and loving heart, may by her merits and intercession, ever live in the companionship of the hearts of both Mother and Son, through the same Christ our Lord. Amen.

A Litany of the Sacred Heart based on Dilexit Nos

Lord, have mercy
Lord, have mercy
Christ, have mercy
Christ, have mercy
Lord, have mercy
Lord, have mercy

God our Father in heaven
have mercy on us
God the Son, Redeemer of the world
have mercy on us
God the Holy Spirit
have mercy on us
Holy Trinity, one God
have mercy on us
Heart of Jesus, Son of the eternal Father
have mercy on us
Heart of Jesus, formed by the Holy Spirit in the womb of the Virgin Mother
have mercy on us

Heart of Jesus,  inmost being of the incarnate Son and his love, both divine and human                                                                         * have mercy on us

Heart of Jesus,  natural sign and symbol of the boundless love of Christ *

Heart of Jesus part of Christ’s holy risen body,               * 

Heart of Jesus, inseparable from the Son of God who assumed a human body forever *

Heart of Jesus, beating,  real,  alive, loving us                            *

Heart of Jesus, receiving our love in return *

Heart of Jesus, our friend *

Heart of the same Jesus who for love of us, was born in Bethlehem, passed through Galilee healing the sick, embracing sinners and showing mercy, who loved us to the very end, opening wide his arms on the cross, rose from the dead and now living  among us in glory. *

Heart of Jesus, centre and source from which salvation flowed for all humanity *

Heart of Jesus, profound unifying centre of his body, expression of the totality of his person *

Heart of Jesus, signifying the divine love of Christ, united forever and inseparably to his wholly human love transformed by his Divine love * 

Heart of Jesus, beating with the most tender and human affection *

Heart of Jesus, in whose human love,  we encounter his divine love *

Heart of Jesus, the Holy Spirit’s masterpiece *

Heart of Jesus,  heart of the world *

Heart of Jesus, nourishing our lives with the strength of the Eucharist *

Heart of Jesus, pierced, gushing living water, a flowing fountain, outpouring of a spirit of compassion and supplication, wellspring of new life for us *

Heart of Jesus, warm and tender *

Heart of Jesus, who feeds us from his own breast

Heart of Jesus, in which we rest in contemplation *

Heart of Jesus,  source of life and interior peace * 

Heart of Jesus, open to all *

Heart of Jesus, in whom our names are carved *

Heart of Jesus , thinking of me, even the smallest hair of my head *

Heart of Jesus whose intense love is fire and light *

Heart of Jesus, free of anger, free of bitterness, filled with genuine compassion towards its enemies *

Heart of Jesus,  infinite in mercy  *

Heart of Jesus, living in us *

Heart of Jesus, our only Treasure *

Heart of Jesus, all love, forgiveness and justice *

Heart of Jesus one in solidarity with those who are poor and rejected by the world *

Heart of Jesus, consoling us that we might console others *

Heart of Jesus, thirsting for our love *

Heart of Jesus, transforming our hearts *

Heart of Jesus, loving and serving in us *

Heart of Jesus, consoled by our service and love of Christ *

Let us pray.

Grant, we pray, almighty God,
that we, who glory in the Heart of your beloved Son
and recall the wonders of his love for us,
may be made worthy to receive
an overflowing measure of grace
from that fount of heavenly gifts.
Through Christ our Lord.
R/. Amen

Dilexit Nos is an encyclical written by Pope Francis

.Dilexit Nos

Is empathy a sin? A Gospel perspective

As the feast of the Sacred Heart of Jesus is, at this writing, tomorrow, (Friday June 27th in 2025), and June is traditionally the month of the Sacred Heart, I’ve been pondering the heart’s virtues, such as love, compassion, mercy, solidarity, and empathy especially. This seems an urgent topic to write about right now as so many seem to glory in cruelty, others going so far as to call empathy a supposed “sin”.

I’ve had somebody say to me in response to a plea for compassion for migrants, that we “aren’t supposed to be the Church of ‘nice.” “No, I said, “we are supposed to be the Church of radical love.”

The argument that there is a “sin” of empathy, I likely don’t have to tell most of you, is antithetical to the Gospel. At best this argument is coming from people who are trying to protect their hearts from the pain of empathy or their conscience telling them to do something about it. Maybe it’s to justify the hardness of their hearts. God knows what it is. In any case this is the work of the devil. It’s ugly and contrary to love. Love, remember, is what God is and what we are supposed to be doing. Maybe they’ve re-interpreted what that was supposed to mean to love God and love our neighbor as ourselves. It’s hard to understand how that is possible. However here we are hearing anti-empathy declarations.

This belief that empathy is to be quashed and not nurtured or respected is mostly found in certain corners of ultra-reactionary or hyper-rationalist “theology.” The argument usually goes something like:

“Empathy clouds judgment. It leads us to condone sin in others. It makes us sentimental and irrational.”

One time I came home from work and my teen and pre-teen were playing seriously inappropriate music loudly in the house. I turned it off and made them stand in front of a picture of Our Lady and recite the lyrics to her. They couldn’t. I wonder if people who discourage or disdain empathy can look into the face of Jesus and tell him that nonsense they say to other people. Lacking empathy, campaigning against it is the more likely sin.

The “sin of empathy” crowd say they feel manipulated by calls for empathy. They put labels on goodness like “virtue signaling.” rather than being inspired to act with mercy. Maybe they think the man beset by robbers deserved what he got, that the Good Samaritan was weak, stupid, being taken advantage of. Perhaps they would say that the priest and the levite who passed by without helping were the real heroes of the story. Maybe these are people who have been put-upon too much in life, or feel used when they do something for someone, or they have trouble with boundaries and they threw the “baby out with the bath water,” as my mom would say. I don’t know but they’re wrong and they try to deceive others as well.

How could empathy erase moral clarity? It can only deepen it and fill it out. As Pope Francis said in Dilexit Nos, his encyclical on the Sacred Heart of Jesus, the human heart brings together fragments of ourselves into cohesion. The heart brings together soul, spirit, mind and body, enabling true discernment and understanding. We can’t attempt to cut off parts of ourselves and call that “clarity” or “judgement.” To do that only mutilates us as people, distorting our judgement and endangering our salvation.

Being “cruel to be kind” is an oxymoron when it comes to the suffering of another. It is merely mean, dumb, and contrary to the Gospel.

Empathy is the ability to enter into another’s experience — to “weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15), to “bear one another’s burdens” (Galatians 6:2), to love your neighbor as yourself (Mark 12:31). Jesus constantly showed empathy:

  • He wept over Lazarus (John 11:35) and over Jerusalem (Luke 19:41)
  • He touched lepers, (Matthew 8:22-26) embraced children, (Mark 10:13-16) noticed the suffering no one else saw and did something about it every time.
  • His Incarnation was an act of ultimate divine empathy — “He took on our infirmities and bore our diseases” (Isaiah 53:4, Matthew 8:17)
  • Toward the lowly he never used “tough love.” He reserved that for the powerful alone. He was angry with them for their oppression of others, for their hypocrisy, their legalism that got in the way of mercy, and for their lack of compassion. (See Matthew 23 for some serious rage from Jesus toward religious leaders for these very things).
  • He healed a woman with a crooked back and was angry when the Pharisees and Scribes confronted him with doing this on the Sabbath. He hated the way they put strict observance of rules over care and compassion for people. (Luke 13: 10-17)

To reject empathy is to reject Christ’s own way of loving. Our Lord never condemned anybody for being too soft hearted; quite the opposite. People were condemned by him for being legalistic without mercy (the Pharisees), for being indifferent to suffering (the priest and Levite in the Good Samaritan story Luke 10:25-37), for being harsh and arrogant instead of humble and compassionate (Luke 18:9–14).

Clearly the “sin of empathy” assertion is a serious distortion of the Gospel – anathema to it. People asking “yeah well who IS my neighbor” and trying to redefine that as people they agree with, like or approve of, are on the wrong path. Don’t listen. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Do not be carried away by strange teaching (Hebrews 13:8 and Ephesians 4:14). If anyone preaches to you a different Jesus than we (the apostles) have, said St. Paul, let them be accursed (Galatians 1:8-9, 2 Corinthians 11:4).

You cannot love God and hate your brother or sister. That would make you a liar. (1 John 4:20)

The intentions of Pope Leo XIV for the month of June are “that the world will grow in compassion.” He says, “Now is the time for love.”

It seems to me there is a battle of good and evil happening, a fight for the soul of the world. I don’t think I usually talk like this. But this anti empathy stuff is the devil. Resist him, solid in your faith. (1 Peter 5:8)

Jesus teaches us that it’s not enough just to resist evil. We have to pray for, bless and love those in the grip of it. We have to shine our light of love and compassion for all to see. And we need to grow in the virtues of the heart ourselves.

Jesus, gentle and humble of Heart, make our hearts like unto thine.

Time Out for Peace

My sweet friend Julia, of the Focolare Movement, (the official name is “The Work of Mary”), mentioned to me once the practice they have of stopping to pray for peace at noon. Looking into this, I found out this was something a young Focolare Blessed, who had died at the age of seventeen in 1990, of bone cancer, had done every day. Her name is Chiarra Luce (meaning “clear light”). She took one minute daily at noon to pray for peace in silence.

In 2023 The Focolare Movement promoted this idea as “The Time Out for Peace Project.

Most of us are at work at that time of day as I am. However if we can’t stop for a whole minute we can stop for a second or two.

The Church provides us with a couple of traditional prayers for noon so that we are all joining together in spirit then. One of these is The Angelus, a Marian prayer prayed for centuries at 6am, noon, and 6pm. This is why the bells of so many Catholic Churches and monasteries ring “Angelus Bells” in a pattern of three times in a row three times. These are a reminder to pray the Angelus. I love the Angelus Prayer and I try to pray it every day. If I can’t, I at least touch foreheads with Our Lady or squeeze her hand or at least pray one Hail Mary at that time. It’s a great way to touch base with her. We can dedicate the Angelus to Peace. After all Mary is the Queen of Peace.

The Angelus

The Angel of God declared unto Mary

R/. And she conceived of the Holy Spirit

Hail Mary…

Behold the Handmaid of the Lord

R/. Let it be done unto me as you have said.

Hail Mary…

And the Word was made flesh (genuflect here)

R/. And dwelt among us.

(stand) Hail Mary…

Pray for us, O holy Mother of God,
R/. That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

Let us pray. 

Pour forth, we beseech you, O Lord, your grace into our hearts: that we, to whom the Incarnation of Christ your Son was made known by the message of an Angel, may by his Passion and Cross be brought to the glory of his Resurrection. Through the same Christ our Lord.

Amen.

The other prayer traditionally prayed at noon is Noon Prayer (or “Sext’) from the Liturgy of the Hours. Lest this sound complicated, there are apps for your phone so you can access this simple prayer break in this middle of the day. The Divine Office App or the Universalis App are both good. You can also access the Liturgy of Hours free online at Universalis. It’s made up of a hymn (I usually skip it), three Psalm selections, a short Scripture reading, and a brief closing prayer. It sounds long but it only takes a few minutes in practice.

I sometimes stop for a minute, and look at Jesus residing in my heart. Once I have greeted him I will tell him I am asking him for peace. Sometimes we talk about it. Other times we are quiet and I occasionally say mentally, “Peace, Lord, Peace,” or I imagine us going around the world calming fear, protecting those in danger, reconciling peoples, stopping bombs. I know I can’t stop anything but he can and he likes to have me along I think. He seems to love sharing his work with us. I see imagination as a way to focus intention and express prayer in the same way words do. We don’t need words in order to pray. Neither do we need imagination to pray, but I find it nice.

Of course you can pray for peace in whatever way you like and for however long or briefly you like. These ideas are only suggestions for anyone who wants them.

The important thing is to take time each day, preferably at noon so we can join together by heart, and the Lord will enjoy the prayers for peace crossing his earth with the sunlight like the movements of a song.

Blessed Chiara Luce, pray for us. For peace.

Creating a Unique Wedding Vigil: A Personal Journey


My late husband, Bob, during our engagement, had been deeply moved by his first Holy Thursday mass. Watching the priest wash parishioner’s feet impressed him profoundly.

One time we were talking about Vigils the night before Catholic funerals. He wondered if the same thing happened before a wedding – a service with readings, prayers and a rosary. I said no but I wish that there was a tradition like that.

Bob thought we should have one. Well why not? We found out this was something that had to be a private thing we did at home rather than in the Church. We started planning our at home wedding vigil.

We looked at books like The Blessing Cup and a Catholic wedding prep book called Marriage, Sacrament of Hope and Challenge, for ideas since both contained little rituals that could be done at home, and then we wrote our own.

We invited friends over for the night before our wedding (we had our bachelor and bachelorette parties earlier in the week).

Bob definitely wanted us to wash each other’s feet, and he wanted a way to include my kids from my first marriage (their dad had died in a car crash when they were little). He felt he wasn’t just marrying me but becoming family to them too. So he bought them both necklaces as tokens of his commitment to them too.

Bob was not Catholic (yet). Most of his friends weren’t either. So while we Catholics prayed the rosary, the non- Catholics could go to the back yard where Bob would have a fire going and could play guitar and sing and people could talk or join him. We rosary pray-ers would join them when we finished.

Our ceremony included an opening prayer, a Scripture reading, intercessions, and an exchange of words of commitment before we washed each other’s feet. We included Bob’s gifting the necklaces to the girls, the sharing of a “Blessing Cup” we passed around, an Our Father and a closing prayer and plus lots of hugs.

I mostly remember that just as he finished washing my right foot, he gave my toes a squeeze with those big warm calloused hands of his.

I think a wedding vigil is such a beautiful idea, a wonderful thing to do. A couple needs as many prayers and as much support as they can get!

Bob was already fighting brain cancer by the time we did this. Our marriage was far from long enough but it was a beautiful one. I am extra glad we started it this way.

Our favorite wedding picture. 🙂

Honoring Pope Francis’ Love for Mary

I’ve found myself having trouble writing about Pope Francis since his death but I feel I should. It has been hard because I grieve him as so many do, in a deep, personal way, as well as with the Church and the world. 

However, I thought with May coming up in a few days, the month the Church has dedicated to Mary, I could honor Pope Francis’ profound love of Our Lady.

Pope Francis turned to Mary the way a child turns to his mother. One of his first acts as Pope was to visit the ancient icon of Salus Populi Romani in Rome, in the Church of St. Mary Major, the oldest church dedicated to Mary. And he returned to that image again and again—before every apostolic journey, and after, to thank her. He entrusted the whole Church to her care and often encouraged us to do the same. In the Byzantine icon, Mary holds the Child Jesus, who holds the book of the Gospel. To me, since his view of Our Lady was centered in the Gospel, much as everything else about him was, that icon seems especially appropriate for him. 

He has requested to be buried in St. Mary Major, near that icon where he prayed so often. He said to the coadjutor of that church, Rolandas Mackrikas,  Mary appeared to him there asking him to arrange to be laid to rest in that place where Francis had so often come to visit her. He said “I’m so glad she has not forgotten me!”

Francis’  daily prayers included the Rosary, and his heart was especially close to the Marian devotions of Latin America—like Our Lady of Luján, the patroness of Argentina. Mary was not a “plaster saint” to him. (He cautioned against seeing her that way). She was a presence in his life. She was a real person to him. 

The Holy Father spoke often of Mary as the “Mother of the People,” especially the poor and suffering. This view of Mary is prominent in Latin American spirituality. Mary walks with the people, accompanies them in their suffering and joy. This is what Franics himself was like. He wanted to be near people, to accompany them, love them, stand up for them, listen to them. Maybe he took after his Blessed Mother. 

Pope Francis reminded us that in her Magnificat, Mary praises the God who casts down the powerful and lifts up the lowly, who feeds the hungry and sends the rich away empty. (Luke 1:46-55).  Mary stood for, rejoiced in,  justice for the poor and the oppressed, and we should too. 

In Our Lady, he said, the Church sees what it means to be humble and brave at once.

Mary was little, and saw herself as lowly,  but she was bold in faith and love. 

My favorite Francis quote on Mary is about her brave humility at the Annunciation; in her response to the message of the Angel Gabriel. 

“She recognizes that she is small before God, and she is happy to be so.” (Angelus December 24, 2017)  He saw her humility as joyful,  open to God, and brave. 

And she was brave. Look at her life, so often turned upside down. But she always put Jesus and his mission, and put the Church, first, every time, even when she didn’t understand what was happening. She trusted, doing the will of God as soon as she knew it, no matter what it was, because she was great of heart. 

Pope Francis is the Pope who gave us the feast of Mary, Mother of the Church, celebrated on the Monday after Pentecost. She is the Mother of Jesus, involved in our salvation and in the life of the Church, united with us in prayer as she was on the day of Pentecost. (Acts 1:14)

He also called Mary the first disciple —the one who listened deeply, believed without having all the answers, and followed her Son to the cross. 

 Francis loved that she was a woman of deep prayer as well as action. 

Immediately after the Annunciation, “Mary arose and went with haste” to visit Elizabeth and assist her in her need. After the most intense and important mystical experience anybody on earth had ever had or ever would have, Mary immediately dives into service and love, helping her relative Elizabeth who is pregnant at an advanced age. (Luke 1:39-56) In the same way, Francis, and we, draw strength from prayer and contemplation. Then we immediately become servants of love. That is what Mary did, and it is what Francis did too. He thought of her as an evangelist, carrying Jesus to others wherever she went. To me this describes Pope Francis well. 

In times of crisis, Francis always turned to Our Lady. During the pandemic, he asked the world to pray with him under her protection. In war, hunger, and fear, he encouraged us to say simply: “Mother, help us.”

In a time of grief, it feels right to turn to Mary—because that’s what Pope Francis would have done. He trusted her with his life and his Church. In this month of May, maybe we can do the same. We can pray the Rosary, light a candle, sing the Salve Regina, or simply say, “Stay with us, Mother.”

If we want to carry his spirit forward, we might start by walking with her.

In one of his homilies, Pope Francis said, “A Christian without Mary is an orphan.” But none of us are orphans, even though a wonderful father and beautiful light in the world has gone from us. Mary holds us even now, and she holds her son’s faithful shepherd, Francis close. May she carry him to the arms of Jesus, and may she walk with us until we meet again. 

“Mother, help our faith! 

Open our ears to hear God’s word and to recognize his voice and call. 

Awaken in us a desire to follow in his footsteps, to go forth from our own land and to receive his promise. 

Help us to be touched by his love, that we may touch him in faith. 

Help us to entrust ourselves fully to him and to believe in his love, especially at times of trial, beneath the shadow of the cross, when our faith is called to mature. 

Sow in our faith the joy of the Risen One. 

Remind us that those who believe are never alone. 

Teach us to see all things with the eyes of Jesus, that he may be light for our path. And may this light of faith always increase in us, until the dawn of that undying day which is Christ himself, your Son, our Lord!” – Pope Franics 

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑