When she was 15, my eldest daughter, Maire, getting ready for Confirmation, volunteered for the Children’s Liturgy at our parish. Small children would file out of mass with cute music just before the readings. They would be led into a little side room where volunteers read the Gospel to them in a way they could understand. My daughter, Maire loved little kids. She was perfect for this ministry. She loved little kids she met or played with so much she would write their names on her notebooks with hearts and other designs equally sweet.
She came in to teach the kids when it was her turn. It was nearing the end of Advent. The adults looked nervous when this little goth girl came in to work with the kids. The first thing she did is ask them what they wanted for Christmas and let them talk about that. Then she asked them, “What does Jesus want for Christmas? It’s his birthday! What do you think he would like best?” Visible relief on adult faces around the room.
But this is a really good question. What does he want? I think one thing leads to another and covers everything and that’s “making time to be alone with the One who [you] know loves [you.”] (St. Teresa of Avila). I think this because making that time, being with him, leads us to all of the other things he likes, such as transformation in him, generosity, love that leads to service. He wants YOU for Christmas.
As Mother Teresa of Calcutta wrote:
The fruit of Silence is Prayer. The fruit of Prayer is Faith. The fruit of Faith is Love. The fruit of Love is Service. The fruit of Service is Peace.
When we make time to be alone and quiet with the One Who we know loves us, our faith is deepened as we come to know Jesus more intimately. Love expands in us as we cultivate a deeper relationship with him, and this love pours out naturally in service.
So what does Jesus want for Christmas? You, of course. Your time, your love, your attentiveness, your quiet heart (yes you can have a quiet heart), your receptivity to him.
Do we have to pray at Church to carve out this time for Jesus? In the presence of the Blessed Sacrament is always a great place to pray. However, no. Anywhere you can be alone for a while is good.
As someone who was a single parent for many years, I know how hard it can be to find any alone time. You can, though. You just have to be creative and flexible that’s all. He can work withy whatever time you have. You can pray in the car if you arrive early somewhere. I love it when I am ten minutes early. Since I have social anxiety it helps a lot to get someplace early and take that time to sit with Jesus for a while before dealing with people.
I confess I also hid in the tree house sometimes once the kids were older. Just for a while. I could still hear them.
I did all this getting up early so I had time to pray, or staying up late to do so, or praying in silence on my break at work because once you get in the habit of silent prayer, it’s something you want very much to do. I cherished that time with Jesus, even if out of necessity it had to be short.
After a while I came to love prayer because I knew he wanted me there. He really was the One who I knew loved me and it made him happy for me to stop what I was doing and set aside time for him.
St. Teresa of Avila said that if we can get into the habit of the Prayer of recollection we will “attain what we desire in six months.” What do we desire from prayer? What do we long for most from God?
I love this quote from the poet Hafiz
Ask the Friend for love.
Ask him again.
For I have learned that every heart will get
What it prays for
Most.
I think we are made for love and we know God is love. Any trouble we could take to give the Lord our time is infinitely worth it. As St. Teresa says, “life is like a night at a bad inn.” But Jesus is forever.
So go into your room, shut the door, and pray to your Father in secret. The Son and the Holy Spirit will come and live with you.
*I am including a guide to the Prayer of Recollection I wrote some years ago. My new little book about the Prayer of Recollection is out right now, Meeting the One Who loves you; the way of prayer of St. Teresa of Avila, and available from Our Sunday Visitor Bookstore as well as Amazon and Barnes and Noble or whatever you buy books.
One of the best tools I have ever found to form new habits is the book Atomic Habits by James Clear
I am quite neuron-divergent in several ways and forming a new habit is sooooooo difficult for me. My favorite idea from that book was to commit to two minutes daily to this new thing you want to start doing. You won’t be overwhelmed by two minutes at all for anything. It won’t see like such a big deal to you to sit down with Jesus for only two minutes at the same time each day. Stay with the two minutes until you are into the swing of it and then you’re off! Start adding to it little by little.
How long should you pray? My personal goal has always been thirty minutes at a time daily. After years of the practice of interior prayer, it’s not a big deal to pray that long. In fact I add in little snippets of it where I can through the day. I think of them like flowers tucked into a rock wall here and there with a little moss. You have the nice strong wall at the cornerstone of your 30 minutes of interior prayer, and then these pretty little flowers modestly adorning it; your few minutes here and there in the car in a parking lot, between jobs, a few minutes before bed, or after evening prayer or after mass.
The rewards of this little habit are like water to the soul. All your other practices of faith are immeasurably deepened. Your faith will mean more to you than ever and not in a weird way that makes you annoying to other people, but in a way that flows out with honest love to everything and everyone in your life. Most of all it makes the Lord so happy and you will grow so much closer to him.
As St. John of the Cross wrote, “In the evening of your life you will be judged on love; so love, the way God wants, and leave off your own way of acting.” This makes me chuckle a little. We all have our own little ideas about what is the most holy thing to do and sometimes it’s not what we thought. He seems to like the simple things. “Sit down with me, and let yourself be loved.” Or as our St. Teresa said, “I am only asking you to look at him.”
Come, and you will see. Advent is the perfect time for this; to cherish Jesus within you as Mary did, to ponder the Lord in our hearts, to reflect him as she did, love him as she did. Right here. It’s the perfect gift.
I’m still processing the experience I think. But it was a lovely day. We had lunch with a friend, walked along the river, hung out in a coffee shop a bit and went over to the basilica. We joined the silent line of people going around the left side of the Church to pray in front of St. Terese’s relics. People knelt and touched the glass around her reliquary. They touched their rosaries, their crucifixes from home, or laid a hand on the glass. I didn’t know how I would feel. But when I knelt there beside her what I felt was all my love for her. I felt clear and present. I prayed for everyone who asked and everyone I offered to pray for and everyone and everything I could think of. I cried a little bit which surprised me. I almost never cry. My daughter prayed there and touched a rose petal to the reliquary. She has been having a hard time. The day before we left though, a friend who doesn’t know who St. Therese is left her a bouquet of roses on our front porch. I told my girl they had to be from St. Therese. ♥️
We stayed for mass. It was in Spanish but we could understand a little and the mass is the mass. It’s easy to know what’s going on in any language. I thought how beautiful the mass sounds in Spanish.
We went outside to see my friend Fr. Gregory. He was in a great mood. It was so good to see him. I gave him a copy of my new book. They have my other one at their book store and they will get this one too. I also might go do another talk down there in January or maybe during Advent.
They had a booth where people were telling stories about the impact of St. Therese in their lives. So I told our family story about her. * (I will put that at the end as notes. )
Then we found out they had relics of St. Therese’s parents Zellie and Louis Martin so we went down to see them and pray with them a while. They had a special table for prayer requests about child loss and about marriage. They had large prints of some of their letters and pictures of them with their family.
We prayed there with the relics a while then filed upstairs with others to visit Therese again. I remember the lady I saw on our second visit who was holding up her dog to St. Therese, even pressing him against the glass and bowing her head, praying fervently. She was praying for him it looked like. That’s good because I prayed for my dog Joey too and a sick dog (Lucy) of a friend along with everything else. I prayed that all the people there would be touched by St. Therese, that she would hear them all and comfort them, that she would help them. ♥️
My daughter and granddaughter fell asleep on the drive home. I smiled a lot in the dark, continuing to pray, feeling grateful and happy.
*Our best St. Therese story:
My first husband, and the father of my children lost his life in a car accident when my eldest, Maire, was almost five. My youngest, Roise, was a newborn. Maire wanted her first Communion early. I explained that she would do that with her class in second grade. She was upset. She used to cry at mass and after mass. She would say, “But I NEED the Body and Blood of Jesus!” We talked to our priest, Father Dean, about this. He agreed that if I would teach her what she needed at home that summer, he would allow it. We set the date for July 16, the feast of Our Lady of Mt. Carmel. She had wanted Immaculate Heart of Mary but we had to be in a wedding that day.
We started our lessons and as the day drew nearer she started worrying that maybe she shouldn’t do it, but go with her class. Maybe God didn’t want her to do this early. After all it was a very big deal. So we started a novena to St. Therese. Every night we prayed at bed time and Maire asked her to send a yellow rose if she should take this step now, and an orange one if the answer was to wait.
Then we went on a trip to visit her dad’s family in Wisconsin. It was a good visit. When we got home she got in the shower while I unpacked. There was a bouquet of yellow roses in our suitcase. I couldn’t believe it. I called them and asked if any of them had done that. Nobody had. So I took the roses and poked them through to the other side of the shower curtain. The sight was received with much rejoicing.
Little Maire received First Holy Communion that July. She had not even known you get a dress and a party. My mom hand made her dress from scraps of my wedding dress. It was a great day. We still talk about the roses St. Therese sent to reassure Maire that even at her young age she was welcome at God’s table.
*St. Therese has been on U. S. tour. She was in San Antonio from October 31-November , 2025
St. Teresa of Avila talked about the role of the contemplative as a standard bearer. She described the holder of the guidon of Jesus, of love, as having the one goal to hold the banner high no matter what chaos whirls around him, no matter if he is cut to pieces. If the standard bearer should fall, he must struggle to his feet again to hold high the symbol that urges on those in battle, gives them hope, lets them know their comrades are nearby when their courage flags.
I have thought a lot in the past couple of days about what was wrong with me in the midst of the chaos; meaning the violence of thought word and deed since the public murder of Charlie Kirk. I couldn’t hold the banner so much. It wobbled, as Winnie the Pooh would say of his spelling. It wobbled, shook, slipped as I took in entirely too much of what was going on. I have CPTSD and it’s important for me to guard how much craziness I absorb. Also I am an empath type person. I feel what people are feeling deeply. I don’t know about you but the last couple of days have triggered me badly. I have felt like a microcosm of the macrocosm of horror and rage, of compassion and sympathy, of fear and dread. My fight or flight has been FIGHT as usual. I too want to fill my mouth with argument along with everyone else.
St. Teresa would be the first person to say our real war is against ourselves. she advised us to return again and again to “the room of self knowledge.” Well today I am trying that.
Simeon the Prophet told Mother Mary that a sword would pierce her heart “so that the secret thoughts of many [would] be laid bare (Lk. 2:35). I have thought about that at times of tragedy and reckoning over the last several years. It does seem that the secret thoughts of many are laid bare in the midst of tragedy, of horrific events. Mary’s heart was pierced through by her love and compassion for her Son, and really, for us too. Murder surely pierces her heart. Injustice, people doing harm to one another, these must hurt her terribly. Jesus Crucified by hate. Again and again.
I have had my PTSD triggered by the event itself; a horrible murder. A father and husband with little kids suddenly dead. I lost my first husband in a car accident when my youngest was three months old and my eldest three weeks shy of her fifth birthday. I can hardly stand to think of what Kirk’s widow is going through today and what she will go through in the days, weeks, months, years ahead of her. She will have to watch her children grieve. She will have to be there for them as her world is ending. I can’t imagine people watching video all over the world of my husband dying a gruesome death. I was surprised when the sun still rose the day after my husband died. I watched in shock as the news came on and people went to work and school and drove around as if the sky hadn’t fallen. I feel for her very much.
The secret thoughts of many have been laid bare haven’t they? I’ve been triggered by some of their reactions as well as the original event. Some people have been sanitizing the murdered man as if he had been a saint when he was a rank racist who said things every day that could get people harassed, threatened and endangered and did. His public life was all about hate. Then people I thought were sane are saying his work should be “continued,” (Gavin Newsom) or that he “did politics the right way.” (Ezra Klein).
Some have been fawning over him. Their hero is dead. Incomprehensible to me. He was horrible. Look up the things he said for yourself if you don’t believe me.
I think of St. Edith Stein’s saying that truth without love or love without truth is a destructive lie. And look. It is. Historically Black campuses have had bomb threats. The DNC had a bomb threat. Why? I guess because Kirk hated black people? Or because they assumed a black person did it? Because he hated Democrats? They assume the culprit is a Democrat? Brawls have broken out. The president wants to give the man a statue in DC and award him the presidential medal of freedom. Of course he does. He hasn’t helped with his incendiary blaming of “radical left Democrats.”
The outpouring of grief and praise for the man must be a gut punch to the people he harmed with his bullying, with his hate and his stirring up more and more hate. I know it’s a gut punch for me. My heart is the most with the vulnerable and persecuted. That’s where I think it should be. However that solidarity of mine has caused me a lot of rage over the last couple of days. A friend said, to my prayer online for peace and an end to political violence, “You’re a good person.” I replied, “Not really.” I noticed one of my kids put a laughing emoji on that. Thanks a lot Roise.
Also triggering to me is the response of people who want to skip the ugly process of truth and reckoning to get to the peace they think would come if we all decided to just get along and lay aside our differences. To me that’s fake peace. After the things I have been through I have seen enough of that. How can we love our enemies if we whitewash and sanitize what they have done? That’s fake love. It’s useless, wrong even.
I see how I have been freaking out about all this; angry, horrified, scared for our country, taking in too much of what everyone is saying and what the news is when I know that makes me so upset.
Maybe I can offer up all the wild inner agony I have had about all this to God to help someone somewhere. Mary’s piercing of the heart was co-redemptive. I can entrust my little offering of a struggling heart to her.
I pray that I’ll be able to love Kirk- who by all accounts would be an enemy of mine at least as a public figure- in the way God wants me to. Right now that seems to me to be to pray for his salvation, for a beautiful forever life with God for him. Whatever he is doing, Charlie Kirk understands more than any of us do now. He has a completely different perspective. He has encountered eternal love and life. May he embrace them, embrace him who is love and life himself with all of his heart and possess them forever. God says he will give us all new hearts instead of our stony hearts. Amen amen.
I need to ask for that for myself, too. For all of us.
I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh”
Last summer I finished the manuscript for a little book about the Prayer of Recollection of St. Teresa of Avila. This summer it will be released. My goal was to teach the prayer in an engaging and accessible way. Lots of people know Lectio Divina as a contemplative Christian method of prayer and rightly so, but few people know the Prayer of Recollection from the Doctor of Prayer, St. Teresa of Jesus. The only book I could find exclusively about the prayer was just a series of Teresa’s quotes about it. So I wrote one myself.
Saint Teresa said she never knew what it was to pray with satisfaction until the Lord himself taught her what she named “The Prayer of Recollection.” Meeting the One Who Loves You teaches this method of prayer step by step, along with its underpinning concepts, in a friendly, personal way.
Saint Teresa of Ávila taught that the sacred humanity of Jesus is our way to him. She believed in the power of prayer, even the simple inner silence of contemplative prayer — spending time with Jesus and loving him.
Wherever you are in life and in your walk with God, fear not. Only good can come of learning this prayer and making it an important part of your daily life. Saint Teresa knew the transforming love of God in prayer, and consequently, she lived a life of extraordinary richness. If you have a desire to pray more deeply, to grow exponentially in love, and to be connected to God more profoundly, then this prayer is perfect for you.
The release date is Monday, August 25. You can find it at osvcatholicbookstore.com,Amazon, Barnes and Nobles , and other places you find books! Go get one and if you buy it on Amazon be sure and leave a review!
If I don’t watch out I can become a bit of a news junky; especially these days when scary, cruel and chaotic things happen daily. I feel like I have to keep up with all the news and analysis. This is so I can be a better activist and verbal defender of all that is good, and better able to speak up when there is injustice. I also say I keep up with world and national events because I want to hear about things I should pray about. I do pray about these things. However it occurs to me sometimes when I have read the same story or heard the basically the same discussion about the same story over and over in a week’s time, or even in one day, that my time could certainly be better spent praying.
I am thinking about this a lot today especially because it is the feast day of the beautiful Carmelite Saint, Teresa Benedicta of the Cross (Eidth Stein). My Secular Discalced Carmelite Community is named for her.
I have a strong belief that prayer takes us in Spirit along with Jesus and Mary to comfort those who suffer. St. Teresa Benedicta wrote about this beautifully.
The world is in flames: do you wish to put them out? Contemplate the Cross: from the open Heart the blood of the Redeemer pours, blood which can put out even the flames of hell. Through the faithful observance of the vows, you make your heart free and open; and then the floods of that divine love will be able to flow into it, making it overflow and bear fruit to the furthest reaches of the earth.
Through the power of the Cross you can be present wherever there is pain, carried there by your compassionate love, by that very love which you draw from the Divine Heart. That love enables you to spread everywhere the Most Precious Blood in order to ease pain, save, and redeem.
She would have known, from her formation in the Teresian Carmel, that prayer is a true work of the Church. Her spiritual Mother, St. Teresa of Avila taught this and Teresa Benedicta saw how relevant it was for the times she lived in, there in Nazi Germany when she was a woman of a Jewish family and at the end of her life, a Discalced Carmelite nun. She was taken, along with her sister, Rosa, to be put to death in a concentration camp. She was writing in urgent times. She offered her life for her Jewish people.
Some Carmelite nuns used to have a blog called, “Praying the News.’ Each week a different Sister took a news story that stood out to her and write a reflection and prayer, seemingly following the basic pattern of St. Teresa of Avila’s Prayer of Recollection. These particular nuns retired years ago and their blog is now defunct.
However, maybe I should take up their idea. I think I will do something like this. Some Chrsitian publications are doing a prayerful “nonpartisan” reflection and a little prayer about the news. It may not surprise you that I think the time for not taking a side is long over. As St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross put it, “The world is in flames.”
The world is in flames. The struggle between Christ and Antichrist rages openly, and so if you decide for Christ you can even be asked to sacrifice your life.
To me this is self-evident if you aren’t entangled in Trump-ism. The man is an anti-Christ personality and has even led many good people astray though I will never understand how that could have happened.
There are some things I can do about it such as stand up for vulnerable people in the ways I can, and offer them my love, presence and support.
Otherwise I can pray. This kind of prayer is not of the “Oh thoughts and prayers” variety. It’s the kind that trusts God to act, not even knowing what God will do but knowing he hears and that he will.
So I’m going to start thinking about how I can pray the news, more than use up so much time reading and listening to it. (Once is enough, right?)
I’ll see what I can work on. I will try posting a “Praying the news” here each week. How about Sundays?
O beautiful flower of Carmel, most fruitful vine, holy and singular, who did bring forth the Son of God, ever still remaining a pure Virgin, assist us in our necessity.
Oh Star of the Sea, help and protect us.
Show us that thou art our Mother.
Our Lady of Mt. Carmel,
pray for us.
Amen
Day 1
*Pray the Flos Carmeli
I will allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak to her heart.
Hosea 2:14
Mary, Queen of Carmel, take us to the places where God spoke to your heart. Teach our hearts to soften, to open as yours did, that we might hear what the Lord has to say in that tender voice of his. Clear our minds of their scurrying, and help us to be still. Lead us, gentle star, into the deepest depths of quiet and peace by your side. Draw us into the Heart of Jesus.
Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. Walk with her in silence the craggy path to the peaks of Mt. Carmel overlooking the sea. A gentle breeze flutters her veil. Watching, you realize the breeze is a voice speaking to you, that it is the Holy Spirit. What does the Spirit say to you as it ruffles your hair and kisses your face?
Our Lady of Mt. Carmel, pray for us.
Day 2
*Pray the Flos Carmeli
The desert and the parched land will be glad; the wilderness will rejoice and blossom. Like the crocus, it will burst into bloom; it will rejoice greatly and shout for joy. The glory of Lebanon will be given to it, the splendor of Carmel and Sharon; they will see the glory of the Lord, the splendor of our God.
Isaiah 35:1
In you, Mary, the Word was treasured as you meditated in your heart, and in you the Gospel blossomed abundantly. Your soul and your body were miraculously fruitful. In your humble simplicity the Spirit crowned you with splendor and glory beyond our understanding. But when I see you, Mary, you are quiet and smiling- your ornaments all within. Teach us to adorn ourselves with humility and simplicity. Draw us after you by the scent of your flowers of the heart, warmed by the sun that is the Lord’s joy shining on us.
Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. She is walking in a field of wildflowers. Catch up to her. She is picking flowers and filling the hem of her mantle with them. She motions to you and you offer her the bottom of your shirt for the overflow. She smiles and begins to fill the pocket you made for all these flowers. You have to sit down so she can fill your lap too. Lift some to your face and breathe in their scent.
Mary, beauty and glory of Carmel, pray for us
Day 3
*Pray the Flos Carmeli
Who are my mother and my brothers?” he asked.
Then he looked at those seated in a circle around him and said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.
Mark 3:33-35
Mary, you leapt to do the will of God at every sign of it with the love and trust of a little child, with the courage of a warrior bold. You were not only the physical Mother of the Lord, you were his spiritual mother and sister as well. You not only pondered the word of God given to you, but acted on it. Always you “arose and went with haste” wherever the Spirit called you. Teach us to listen, ponder, pray and to act on God’s word to us as you did unfailingly.
*Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. She puts a plate of food in front of you; bread, lentils and dates perhaps. She sits down to eat with you. As you bless the food together, you think, “Let us eat the bread of the will of God.” She smiles at you. You know you will have everything you need to do just that. And this is really good food, too.
Mary, Mother of the Word, pray for us.
Day 4
*The Flos Carmeli
God lives. I am standing in his presence. – The Prophet Elijah . (See 1Kings 17:1)
Mother of Carmel, you tended the fire of continual awareness of God’s presence in your heart daily as you swept the floor, made dinner, worked in the fields, held your Child, shopped in the market, loved and served the people around you. Open our hearts to perceive God within us, and in our daily lives; among the pots and pans, in the work we do daily, in the stolen moment of quiet, in the breaths before sleep. Help us come into the glow of constant contact with God you lived in within you and around you. Teach us the Practice of the Presence of God (Brother Lawrence)
*Spend a quiet moment with Mary now, tending the hearth, keeping the fire burning brightly, talking with her about this and that. Feel the fire’s warm glow on your face. She leans her head on your shoulder.
Mother in whose heart we live, where we find our Beloved, pray for us.
(St. Maryam of Jesus Crucified said, “I live in the Heart of my Mother. There I find my Beloved.”)
Day 5
*The Flos Carmeli
The Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth be silent before him.
Habakkuk 2:20
Mary you were the temple of the Lord in a unique way. How beautifully you show us the truth that we who love Jesus are his temples too. Help us to make time to be alone and silent before God in the temple of our hearts with the One who we know loves us. (Teresa of Avila) As you did, let us cherish the Lord within us, love him, know him, listen to him, silently speak to him, look at him and let him look at us.
Take Mary’s hand now and allow her to lead you gently to your inner Temple where Jesus waits. Be there for a moment.
Mother of Divine Love, pray for us.
Day 6
*Pray the Flos Carmeli
I have set myself in silence and peace,
as a little child has rest in in it’s mother’s arms,
even so my soul.
Psalm 131: 2
Oh Mary, the lowly handmaid, the simple girl who loved God in your littleness, teach us to be little too. Help us to be humble in your easy, joyful way. Help us to be free to run lightly in God’s paths, to laugh easily, to dance without thinking, to be happy in his world that is so beautiful, and vast. The world around us is sign of his creative love, a glimpse of the Kingdom to come we are helping to make present by being little and humble in the arms of Jesus.
Spend a quiet moment playing with the little Mary a game you loved as a child. Let her throw her arms around you then. Hug her back.
Child Mary, little, humble and free, pray for us.
Day 7
*The Flos Carmeli
As Elisha watched, [Elijah being taken up to Heaven] he cried out, “My father, my father, the chariots and horsemen of Israel!” And he saw Elijah no more. So taking hold of his own clothes, he tore them in two. Elisha also took up the mantle that had fallen from Elijah. Then he took the mantle of Elijah that had fallen from him and struck the waters. “Where now is the LORD, the God of Elijah?” he asked. And when he had struck the waters, they parted to the right and to the left, and Elisha crossed over.…
2 Kings 2: 12-14
Holy Mother and Queen of Carmel, your Scapular is your prophetic mantle over our shoulders, a sign of our consecration to you, our silent devotion to you all though the day and during the night when we sleep figuratively wrapped in it’s protection.. The Brown Scapular is your hand on on our shoulder as we travel the Royal Road of prayer, and in the good works you lead us to. Help us to go forward with courage, to stand confidently as your children; seeing as you see, loving as you love, and serving from the heart. Help us to live as worthy sons and daughters of so wonderful a Mother.
*Spend a moment with Our Lady now. Lay your scapular in her lap and let her kiss it and put in on you again over your head and shoulders.
Mary, spiritual daughter of Elijah the Prophet, pray for us who wear your Scapular.
Day 7
*The Flos Carmeli
Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Galations 6:2
Mary, in Carmel you are not only Mother and Queen, you are our sister and friend. Friends bear one another’s burdens. We know that you have always helped us bear our burdens and that you hear our sorrows. We want you to know we are here for you too. Share with us the sorrows of your loving heart, your concerns for your children. We know you always lead people to your Son, that you love us all, that human cruelty breaks your heart terribly. Help us to care about all that you care about, to listen to you, and to do something to help you in your mission to humanity, to be your kindly hands in this world where there is so much hate and indifference. Help us to find joy in all that you take joy in, the good things people do, the beauty to be seen, the love that is there in everything.
*Spend a quiet moment with Mary. Sit with her at her kitchen table maybe with tea or coffee. Ask her what she wants to tell you about. What does she say? Maybe today you can act on one of her concerns.
Mary, our friend and Sister, pray for us.
Day 8
Pray the Flos Carmeli
Leave here, turn eastward and hide in the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan. You will drink from the brook, and I have directed the ravens to supply you with food there.”
So he did what the Lord had told him. He went to the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan, and stayed there. The ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning and bread and meat in the evening, and he drank from the brook.
1 Kings 17:3-6
Mary, as Elijah did, you allowed the Lord to protect and take care of you, to take care of everything. You hid in the heart of God, drinking deeply from the stream of Divine Love. With you let us learn to hear the still, small voice of God, to let him care for us when we are afraid of the consequences of doing as he asks us. Remind us that when we hear him and respond, he will give us all that we need every time, just as he did for Elijah and for you.
*Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. Watch her as she fills a clay jar with water from the stream. It’s a sunny balmy morning. Birds are singing. You can hear the brook flowing. She brings you the water to drink. Drink deeply.
Mary, help of Christians, and Mother of Mystics, pray for us.
Day 9
Like a cedar in Lebanon I grew tall,
like a cypress on Mount Hermon;
I grew tall like a palm tree in Engedi,
like rosebushes in Jericho;
Like a fair olive tree in the field,
like a plane tree beside water I grew tall.
Like cinnamon and fragrant cane,
like precious myrrh I gave forth perfume;
Like galbanum and onycha and mastic,
like the odor of incense in the holy place.
I spread out my branches like a terebinth,
my branches so glorious and so graceful.
I bud forth delights like a vine;
my blossoms are glorious and rich fruit.
Come to me, all who desire me,
and be filled with my fruits.
You will remember me as sweeter than honey,
better to have than the honeycomb.
Those who eat of me will hunger still,
those who drink of me will thirst for more.
Whoever obeys me will not be put to shame,
and those who serve me will never go astray.
Sirach 24:13-22
Mary, Mother and Queen of Carmel, you are all of this and more to us, our beauty, our joy, our wisdom, our love for you an incense offered to the Lord who loves you even more than we can. Today we consecrate ourselves to you, Our Lady of Mt. Carmel. We dedicate our lives to God’s beauty and glory, and to yours. We belong to you, to your Son, to light and life and love. We want to spend our lives in the sweet companionship of your Spirit.
*Spend a quiet moment with Mary now. She is luminous in loveliness, as if she were made of light. You kneel before her. Closing your eyes, to pray, then opening them to see her again, you realize you are next to her in the kitchen. She is chopping vegetables. Join her. Stay with her all day.
Mary, Mother and Queen of Carmel, our Sister the Throne of Wisdom, pray for us.
I dreamed about the Prophet Elijah a couple weeks ago. We were sitting on a mountainside talking.The conversation we had is lost to me for the most part. It seemed significant that I dreamed of him. In the time following, I re-read the stories of Elijah’s life in Scripture.
*You can find these in 1 Kings chapters 17-19, and 21,
2 Kings Chapters 1-2, and in Sirach 48:1-11.
The pattern of his life that stood out to me as I read and reflected, is the path of the holy activist.
Elijah embodies the prophetic response to times of upheaval and injustice. He is an icon of a prophet arising in a time of darkness, burning like a torch. He spoke truth to power, confronted corruption, and defended the vulnerable. He drew his strength and inspiration from God as he served the hungry, healed the sick, and returned to a hostile land he had run in fear from. Sometimes he was afraid for his life, frustrated, burned out. Then he charged back into the fray, blazing, lit by God’s transforming love. Elijah’s life is a map lighting the path of the holy activist.
Elijah confronted corrupt leaders
King Ahab and Queen Jezebel were horrible, shameless, lawless people. They were greedy, murderous, corrupt idolaters and false accusers leading the people into apostasy. Elijah confronted them several times over killing the prophets and destroying God’s altars, taking from and murdering the poor, warning of consequences to come.
During one of his confrontations with Ahab, the king called Elijah his enemy, blaming him for causing trouble. This happens a lot to anyone who speaks up against wrongdoing. Elijah doesn’t care what the King says. He contradicts him briefly, undeterred. He doesn’t let himself be drawn into argument. He delivers God’s message with its warning and walks away, leaving the results in God’s hands.
If you have to call out corruption or injustice, remember to detach from what happens after you have spoken. You can do your part and the rest is up to the hearers to choose how to respond.
Elijah spoke truth to power
Baal, a pagan god whose worship included child sacrifice, was popular at the time just as destructive ideologies have so much sway now. Elijah was the only prophet of the God of Israel left and the Queen was trying to kill him as well. Sometimes we have to speak the truth at great risk.
Elijah called the priests of Baal to meet him for a duel between their false god and the true God of Israel. The prophet of God stands alone against 450 priests of Baal and before his own people who had gone over to them. He trusted God to act. Dramatically and miraculously, God came through, sending fire from Heaven to consume Elijah’s sacrifice.
God will give us everything we need to do as he asks; to stand up and speak out even if we are all alone in doing so, he is with us.
Elijah made use of humor
I want to add that Elijah made fun of the prophets of Baal as they called to their false god. He taunted them sarcastically about whether their god was sleeping, or deaf or busy. “Maybe you should yell a little louder.”
Making fun of the powerful can be a good thing at times like these so we aren’t overcome by fear or hopelessness. Those late night comedians keep me going sometimes. I’m all for it. After all, Elijah ends up slaying the false prophets and there are more ways than one to slay.
So if you can, find ways to laugh. Bring the powerful down to size with humor.
Elijah served the needy with faith and compassion
After a time of frustration and even despair, God sends Elijah on a journey to help a poor widow and her son who are on the brink of starvation.
By the prophet’s prayers and the woman’s trust, her oil jug never runs dry and her flour jar never runs out of flour until the famine is over.
Elijah prayed over her son when he fell ill and died while he was there, which brought the child back to life. Elijah shows himself to be a man of profound compassion and faith. His service to the widow renews him and helps him grow.
If you’re freaking out, an act of kindness or service will help your perspective and give you peace.
Defending the poor and oppressed
King Ahab and Queen Jezebel conspired to take the ancestral land of a man named Naboth after he refused to sell. It was already against Jewish law to press someone to sell their family land. Then Jezebel arranged false accusations against Naboth because of which he was executed. Then the King took over the man’s land. Naboth stands for all of the poor who suffer injustice and oppression, from the greed of the rich and powerful, from unjust systems.
Always defend the poor and oppressed and be sure that even if you don’t think you succeed in doing so, God will, either now or in the future.
Being guided by God, motivated by love
One of the times Elijah was in hiding, God asked him, “Elijah, what are you doing?” Elijah pours out his heart to the Lord. He tells him how scared he is with the Queen trying to have him killed. Then he tells God of his burning, intense love for him, which is the spark of his zeal. This is what it means to be a holy activist. Our inspiration, our strength, our courage to confront people in power, our compassion, our hunger and thirst for righteousness, are all from God.
Now and then it’s important for an activist of faith to do some soul searching with God. What are you doing? Why are you doing it? Is God with you on this?
Elijah experienced burnout and renewal
Twice in Elijah’s life story, we see him in hiding, scared and frustrated, overwhelmed to the point he wants to die and asks God to let him. He suffers from exhaustion, fear, frustration and self doubt. Twice God comes to him like a gentle parent, giving him bread, telling him to drink some water and have something to eat. Elijah rests, gets some sleep, and is fed by God until he is ready for a new mission, and sets out restored and reassured.
If you’re overwhelmed or burned out, let God care for you for a while. Rest, get extra sleep, until you’re ready and receive new guidance.
Elijah encounters God profoundly
God calls Elijah to the mouth of the cave he has been staying in, and invites him to experience him passing by. There is a mighty wind, but the wind is not God. There is an earthquake but neither is this God. When Elijah hears a “still, small voice” within himself, in a gesture of reverence as he covers his face with his cloak, recognizing the presence of the Lord.
Draw from the Source of all life, and practice attentiveness to God’s presence at all times. You will grow exponentially in love, strength and compassion, reflecting the Lord you love and listen to.
Elijah mentored the next generation to take on the work
An important part of activism is handing on the spirit of the work to the next generation. Elijah, after training Elisha at his side, grants him a double portion of his spirit before he is taken up to heaven. Elisha takes the mantle of his mentor over his shoulders, going on to do the great work of a prophet.
Whatever form of activism or mission you are involved in, always take time to talk to interested young people and pass on your wisdom and experience.
I’ve been so worried about so many things going on in our country, in our world. Maybe you have been too. Let us look to the Prophet Elijah to light our way, asking him for a double portion of his spirit, praying for the knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out. * from the 11th Step of AA
“The lord lives! I am standing in his presence.”
*Antiphon from the Carmelite proper, feast of Elijah the Prophet, July 20
if you’re dealing with a profound loss, the after effects of tragedy or post traumatic stress you may be feeling spiritually dead. Maybe you think you’ve lost your faith or that God has left you. It may be helpful for you to know there are neurological reasons for this apparent loss of your spiritual senses.
When there is a traumatic event or a terrible loss in our lives, our brains are actually affected. Trauma can disrupt the brain’s ability to process spiritual experiences by affecting its prefrontal cortex, amygdala, hippocampus, and temporal lobes. These areas are also involved in emotional regulation, memory, and our sense of self, even our feeling of connection with something greater than ourselves. Dysfunction in these regions can lead to a disconcerting loss of or distortion in a person’s spiritual life. It’s difficult for us to feel God with us, or to reach the peace we used to find in prayer and the practice of our faith.
The prefrontal cortex is responsible for self-reflection and focus. It helps us in practices like contemplative prayer and meditation by supporting awareness and attention. When this part of the brain is dealing with trauma we can’t seem to relax. We may feel void of any spirituality at all. Even the sacraments we believe in feel oddly empty as if we are merely spectators. Everything may seem meaningless to us now because the brain is preoccupied with stress and survival due to its injuries from trauma.
The amygdala and hippocampus process emotions, especially fear and joy. It gives us a sense of our life stories, of our own history. Spiritual experiences often evoke intense emotions and build on a relationship with God that we have developed over time. Trauma can even shrink the hippocampus . It may be hard to remember the love we once knew with God. Without this memory of the lived experience of God’s love and mercy, it’s hard to trust the Lord or that he is still there at all.
With post traumatic stress the amygdala becomes hyperactive, keeping our brains in a state of fear and hypervigilance. We might also feel emotionally overwhelmed and dysregulated making daily life difficult let alone communion with God.
The temporal lobes of the brain are associated with mystical experiences, and our perception of religious imagery. They also help us integrate our sensory experiences in life into spiritual meaning. Sustaining trauma can cause either overactivation or underactivation of the temporal lobes. This can lead to either intense visions or else fear-based religious thoughts. On the other hand, we may feel emotionally and spiritually blank. Where is God?
“God my God, why have you forsaken me?” Mark 15:33-34
Our anterior cingulate cortex helps us feel empathy and compassion. It’s also involved in the regulation of emotions and our sense of the Divine.The damage of trauma can impair the ACC. We may feel lost, cut off emotionally from our friends. We feel empty and alienated from people and God.
“Friend and neighbor you have taken away.
My one companion is darkness.” Ps. 88:18
The insula processes sensations and emotions, contributing to a sense of the nearness of God or a feeling of transcendence during prayer or meditation.Trauma can impair the functioning of the insula leading to either low body awareness or too much of it. We can feel a strange detachment from our bodies, unaware of even our physical needs. Conversely we may be overwhelmed by physical sensations, making it hard to relax or focus when we want to pray.
The good news is that contemplative prayer and meditation have been shown to be healing and even restorative to these areas of the brain impaired by trauma. Interior prayer practices and meditation can calm the amygdala, improve prefrontal cortex regulation, and enhance the connectivity of the ACC and insula, restoring emotional balance and renewing our sense of connection.
It means a lot to me that Jesus experienced trauma and that he allowed himself to descend into the depths of the abyss of abandonment when he cried out from the cross his desolation.
St. John of the Cross taught about the “Dark Night of the Soul,” a phase of the spiritual life of many Christian contemplatives and mystics, which seems to have similar effects as trauma does on our prayer life. St. John of the Cross wrote that “in the dark night of the soul, bright flows the river of God.” He teaches us that God is nearer than ever before at times we feel he is farthest away. He says to go on “naked faith” and not to give up.
I have found it true that “God is close to the broken hearted, those whose spirit is crushed he will save.” (Psalm 34:18)
So if you are grieving a tragedy, experiencing trauma or post traumatic stress, and your’re having trouble with spirituality as a result don’t blame yourself. You haven’t done anything wrong. Nor have you lost God.
We know Mary and Joseph were holy and faithful people but they still lost Jesus for three days. Maybe you feel bereft but he is still there in the temple of your heart and you will find him again just as they did.
It’s ok to pray in ways you can handle. Don’t hold yourself to what you used to do. For me emotional overwhelm kept me from deeper methods of prayer after a tragedy in my life. I talked to Jesus about it. I told him, “I still love you. I just need you not to come so close for now. Can you sit farther away but still nearby?” So he sat with me but not too close. I chose what felt to me a less personal or emotional method of prayer. I memorized psalms, set prayers or passages from the mystics I love like St. Teresa of Avila and Julian of Norwich. When I could handle it I sat quietly and slowly went over them in my mind as a form of prayer/meditation. Other times all I could do was hold my rosary. These things slowly began to bring me peace again.
My friend Jim had said “the devil will try to kick you when you’re down and darkness tries to overwhelm you at times like this so keep doing the things that are of light: the rosary, going to mass, whatever you can do.” He said that would keep my lamp alight no matter what I was going through. He was right.
And after all:
“The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” John 1:5
“We need no wings to go in search of Him, but have only to look upon Him present within us.”
St. Teresa teach me how to find Jesus within myself where you say he is enthroned in the center of my heart. Show me how to go within, to see his beauty, know his tenderness. You overcame impediments from the world, and reluctance of your own, to seek him and keep him company with growing love and joy. Lead me in the first steps onto the Royal Road of prayer meant for me, so that I may walk in the glow of your lamp held high to light my way.
Pray now a slow, attentive Our Father.
Day 2 The Sacred Humanity of Jesus
“Never set aside the Sacred Humanity of Christ. To do so is to lose your anchor.”
We are not Angel spirits as St. Teresa pointed out. We are human. We need a hug. We need to know that Jesus had and has hands and feet, had to blow his nose sometimes, that he sweated over his work, that his feet were often dirty in his sandals from all that walking he did, that he cried, that he laughed that he needed his friends as well as time alone. He knows all the stars by name but he also knows and cares about every tear we shed. He is glory beyond glory but when he takes our hands we can feel that they are work roughened and warm. You can trace your thumb along the deep scar in his palm.
Let yourself be captured by his eyes; dark and lovely. Ask him now: Jesus be real to me.
Day 3: Friendship with Christ
“It is a great thing to have experienced the friendship of Jesus Christ, because the friendship of His Majesty is full of love and reward.”
St. Teresa’s spirituality is rooted in friendship with Jesus, which implies intimacy, informality, and mutuality. She cautioned us not to be irreverent toward the Lord. She often called him “Your Majesty” when she spoke to him. At the same time she had a complete trust in his love and regard for her as his friend, his dear friend, a friend he trusted and loved to be with. She loved him back in a deeply personal way. She strove to bring her loving attentiveness to his presence into all that she did throughout the day, and to make time to be alone with him in conversation or sweet silence.
Jesus no longer calls us servants but friends. Try thinking of him as the Friend who you know loves you and who you love back.
Make friends with Jesus. Teresa says the best way to start is to ask him humbly for his friendship.
Here he is. Ask him now.
Day 4: Come into the castle of your soul
“I began to think of the soul as if it were a castle made of a single diamond or of very clear crystal, in which there are many rooms, just as in Heaven there are many mansions.”
“The door of entry into this castle is prayer and meditation.”
Oh Teresa what a beautiful vision you had of what I look like inside and Who lives there!
Help me to find my way to the Lord within. Show me how to open the beautiful doors of my heart to see the One I love so intensely. I want to sit at his feet. I want to be in his arms against his Sacred Heart listening to its beating.
Call to me Lord, draw me, help me to love you truly, to be all yours, to listen to you, know you, to walk through the rooms of the castle seeking your hand.
Let me hear your voice and see your face for your voice is sweet and your face is beautiful.
Day 5 Solitude and silence
”Settle yourself in solitude, and you will
come upon him in yourself.”
“Silence is God’s first language.”
Sometimes Jesus went off by himself to be alone and to pray. How much more do we need to do the same, to go into our inner room, close the door on the outside world with its sights and sounds and interruptions for a time.
Teresa talked about this as recollecting the senses and bringing them within ourselves like bees returning to the hive to make honey.
Let’s find time to be alone today in quiet, even for a few minutes, to go within ourselves where Jesus waits.
Greet him by the name you most love to call him.
Do you have anything you need to say to Jesus? Does he say anything to you?
Maybe you have a conversation with him.
Now sit with him in silence in a comfortable kind of way, the way friends do.
St. Teresa pray for us that we will come to love silence and solitude where we can be alone with God.
Day 6 Talking to Jesus
“But above all things, I want to impress upon you that, when we are speaking to him, we should look at him and remain in his presence, and not turn our backs upon him.”
Have you ever heard the rosary being prayed in church and thought it kind of sounded like an auction underway? It’s so easy to slip into vain repetition – meaning not paying attention to what we are saying or to Whom we are speaking. If the Lord is our friend we want to look at him when we talk to him, to know what we’re saying to him. To be attentive and not mechanical it’s important to slow down, and make conscious contact rather than reciting a formula. Jesus is here wanting us. He is the Friend, the Brother, a Father, our Spouse. St. Teresa advised us to speak to him one way and at other times another. She wants us to speak from the heart whether with our words or with silent love.
Speak to the Lord today, either in the words of a set traditional prayer, your own words, or in quiet attentiveness. In all of these keep the eyes of your soul on him, present within you, listening to you and loving you.
Day 7 Determined determination
St. Teresa you faced so many trials along the path of your spiritual life. Sometimes you laughed at threats like the Inquisition being suspicious of your work and ways. Other times like when a spiritual director thought your prayer experiences were from the devil you cried and you wanted to die and were afraid to be alone.
But God blessed you all the more with the consolations you were told to reject.
At times you even gave up prayer, feeling unworthy.
You dealt with other people’s fears and resentments toward you, opposition and obstacles. Somehow you accomplished all that the Lord asked of you. Once you knew what it was to pray with satisfaction, and once you truly knew the presence and love of God you were unwilling to ever give up prayer again.
You urged us on, reminding us that life is like one night at a bad inn and the prize, Christ himself was worth anything at all we could go through to get to him. You called this single minded persistence determined determination. Pray for us as we make our way inward and ultimately to Heaven, that we will proceed with “determined determination” as you did. Lead us straight into the Heart of Jesus.
Day 8 Holy Mary
It seems to me that there is no better teacher for prayer than the glorious Virgin.”
”Mary treasured all these things, pondering them in her heart.” Luke 2:19
Mary had a listening heart, attentive to every sign of God’s will and inspiration. Immaculately conceived and free from spiritual impediment she had a clarity of perception and relationship with God. She had one great visitation by the Angel Gabriel but we have no record of any visions and extraordinary signs she received otherwise. Mary live by faith as we do, living an ordinary life that was nevertheless quietly extraordinary.
In her heart she pondered and treasured the Word of God himself within herself, then in his daily presence, and remained United with him just as much in spirit as he began his ministry.
Teresa assimilated Mary’s spirit of contemplation, cherishing the Lord within, remaining attentive and united to him at all times. This is why Teresa’s Order of Discalced Carmelites sees Mary as Mother. Sister and Queen, and our primary devotion to her is meditation in the heart, contemplative prayer, perceiving God as within ourselves.
Oh beautiful Flower of Carmel, holy and singular, who brought forth the Son of God, ever still remaining a pure Virgin, assist us in our necessity! Show us that thou art Our Mother! Our Lady if Mt. Carmel, pray for us. .
Day 9 Love
”Amor saca amor.” Love draws out love.
Prayer leads us into union with God and union with God fills us with love, his love becoming ours. Teresa taught us that we should “make many acts of love.” She knew that love was active and effective, more than emotion it blossomed into friendship and service and compassion. The love of God is transformative and the more we pray the more we see that love of others deepens our prayer and prayer deepens the love with which we serve and our desire to serve.
Not only that but prayer becomes almost indistinguishable from love. Prayer becomes love and love becomes prayer.
St. Teresa pray for us and lead us into the depths of love with God. Brighten our way along the Royal Road of the spiritual life. Help us to truly know the Lord we love and live for. Remind us that love is both the means and the goal of this journey. We wish you a happy feast day and we pray for all the intentions you have for the Church, for priests, for the sanctification of the people of God, that Jesus will have the best and trustiest of friends and that we will be among them, that he will be followed and loved and praised and known by all of us. In your special honor we ask all of this of the Lord and in the sweet Name of Jesus.
St. Teresa pray for us. Our Lady of Mt. Carmel, pray for us.
Bethany Hang Out 